Stories from Caregivers: Patricia from SOUTH DAKOTA
SD
Patricia
FROM SOUTH DAKOTA
My husband, Del, is 70 years old. He was diagnosed in August with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. He was offered chemo, but told by the oncologist that it could not be cured. He decided not to receive treatment. He currently is in the care of hospice. A nurse comes three times per week, and a bath aide comes twice a week. He is on numerous medications. Del has good days and bad days. Sometimes I think he is dying and sometimes I can almost forget he is sick. I cannot leave him alone other than just briefly. I work parttime as a dietary aide for a independent living apartment. Prior to my husband being sick, I also worked in the JLC nursing home as a feeding assistant several times per week. I have had to stop working there. I continue to work at the dietary job, but have had times when there was no one to come and care for my husband, so I had to call in. My two daughters take turns caring for their dad. One lives a few miles away, but hasn't had a car, so I had to drive about 5 miles to pick her up. The other daughter lives 40 miles away and comes just once a week. I like to pay for her gas at least once in a while, but haven't been able to. Meanwhile, my elderly dad lives alone. We have been his chief support because I only have one brother and he lives in Kentucky. So it falls to me to make sure his apartment is clean, his laundry is done, and he gets food to eat. He tries to do it, but needs help. I constantly feel guilty because I can't do it all! Our income is social security, augmented by my job. I am in need of surgery to replace my hip. Had it scheduled, but had to cancel. I will have to wait until "after". That's our story.
