Happily, Hopelessly Devoted

Styles at Coachella, 2022

MUSIC

Fan of

Harry Styles

THOMAS SALMON, 52
Watkinsville, Georgia
Shipping manager at a nursery

Thanks to having two kids, I vaguely knew of Harry Styles as the guy from the British band One Direction, which the teenage girls were going crazy for. But when I heard his solo music while watching Saturday Night Live five years ago, something struck me.

As I watched him command the stage, surrounded by vintage-style guitars and his critically acclaimed drummer, Sarah Jones, he immediately reminded me of my 1980s heroes: the Rolling Stones, Bowie, Prince. I thought, Hey! I can get into this!

Harry makes music that shares DNA with the playlist of my early years, and so I’ll play Bowie’s “Changes,” which sounds like One Direction’s “Night Changes,” and my daughter, a Harry fanatic, will spot the influences.

Harry also taps into that old-school, live-show culture, where the music is loud, the sequins are bright and the audience is on their feet the whole time. My daughter, wife and I all scream until our voices give out. Stepping into Madison Square Garden does, for a moment, transport me back to the packed gigs I used to attend in the ’80s, but this time there is no violence. The message is kindness. I may have matured since I first started going to rock shows, but rock has progressed too. And for that, I’m glad.

Fan of

Cher

My earliest memories are of Cher. My room was cluttered with Cher dolls. The biggest punishment my parents could give me was to ban me from watching Sonny and Cher.

When I was a young woman, there were no other women in the media or in my own life owning their sexuality so unapologetically. And any of her supposed imperfections made me love her even more. Cher showed me that you can wear braces and still have people swoon. She’s like the big sister I never had—even though we’ve never met.

Standing behind the bar, I imagine I’m Cher. She aims to entertain, but she doesn’t take crap, and neither do I. And anyone who bad-mouths Cher gets kicked out of my bar.

Fan of

Earth, Wind & Fire

Mark: We found the band before we found each other. We both attended the same event they played at in 1980, before our paths crossed.

Linda: We’re both big kids at heart, dancing and singing at any Earth, Wind & Fire concert we attend …

Mark: … to the horror of our children.

Linda: At this band’s concerts, you leave your ego and identity at the door; there are young, old, different races and even people with oxygen tanks, and everyone has invested their time to feel joy for joy’s sake.

Mark: You’ve got the horns doing their thing; you’ve got the bass player doing his thing; you’ve got the guitars. It’s so full, and it harmonizes beautifully. An Earth, Wind & Fire concert is my happy place. No matter what’s going on in life, no matter how crazy things are, we can go to a show and know that, for two hours, we’re going to have a good time.

Fan of

BTS, a K-Pop Boy Band

Dana Schulman, 76

New Preston, Connecticut

Owner of a gift and stationery

shop and a candy shop

When I first became interested in the band in 2021, I was in a fragile place. It was the sixth anniversary of my husband’s death, and the weight of the loss felt heavier than usual. Mindlessly scrolling through a mishmash of videos on Instagram, I noticed these young men doing amazing choreography and singing in Korean. They gave me a jolt of energy that helped pull me up out of my grief.

I started listening to BTS whenever I was low: in the car, at my desk or dancing around my store. It’s a world far removed from my own that I escape to—a private, joyful place. What has surprised me most is that I’m finding comfort from songs written in a language I don’t even speak. Regardless of cultural differences, the band’s message breaks through: It’s going to be all right.

I think everything comes into your life for a reason. Listening to the band’s music made me feel good about myself. It gave me my mojo back again. I could be flirty. It made me feel more positive about things. My friends said I looked happier. It pulled me out of thinking, Who am I without this man? No matter what life throws at you, you can still find joy.

Fan of

Elton John

Lucy Davis, 60

Woodland, Michigan

Nail technician

Elton has been the greatest constant in my life. He’s been my rock since I was 11.

I had two cousins who were sisters, and they’d come over and we’d listen to 45s together. And then one time in 1974, they brought over the Elton John Greatest Hits album, and I just fell in love with it. My cousins and I started cutting out magazine photos of him and sticking them on my walls. Now I have a designated Elton Room in my house, where I showcase ticket stubs and other mementos, along with vinyl records and posters of him. I’ve moved six times, and I redo the room every time. It’s evidence of a lifelong project that I’ve never grown tired of; each object bears witness to a stage of my life. When my daughter was little, she thought every family had a shrine to a singer in their house.

Elton has also given me my tribe. I gravitate toward colorful and eccentric types, like Elton himself. And after decades of trekking to his concerts, I’ve gotten to know a lot of fellow fans well. We connect on the Facebook group that I founded 15 years ago—it has over 22,000 members. Sometimes people get competitive over how many times they’ve seen Elton, but I don’t get into that. I just like to hear everybody’s stories. There are people who have been fans for 40 or 50 years—I call us the elders—and then there’ll be people who have been fans for only two or three years. And they’ll have to learn everything from us.

Fan of

Los Lobos

Ron Pang, 60

San Gabriel Valley, California

Retired telephone company technician

I grew up in a working-class family in different parts of L.A. My parents were Chinese immigrants, but I was 6 feet tall and had a vaguely Latino look. Strangers thought I was Hawaiian. I always felt a little out of place.

In the 1980s, when I was at community college, I watched a documentary and Los Lobos were playing in the background. I looked them up and really connected with their music. Their tunes were happy and upbeat, but they were singing about heartache and loneliness. Plus, they were a Latino band trying to break into a music industry that at the time seemed to make space only for Caucasian or African American groups. They were outsiders, same as me.

I was working the graveyard shift, processing payments at a bank, and would put their music on my Walkman and tune out the world to get through the nights. The songs were about working-class struggles. And their music has helped me get through some challenging times, including caregiving for my mother-in-law.

When I was first listening to Los Lobos, everything in life was new. Now my wife and I are at that second stage of our lives. We’ve raised our kids. We’ve had our careers. The band has changed too. I’ve watched them evolve and grow, but they still hold a special meaning for me. It’s kind of like your favorite hoodie. When you first had it, it was fresh—and kind of stiff. Over time, as you wear it, it loosens up and changes—but it changes in a way that comforts you.

Fan of

Bruce Springsteen

DONNA WALKER, 58

Greenville, South Carolina

Journalist

It was 1975, and 11-year-old me was doing what I loved most: hanging out in the school library. I was a nerdy kid who enjoyed getting lost in the pages of Time and Newsweek. On that day in the library, I noticed that both of my favorite newsmagazines had this new guy on their covers: Bruce Springsteen. And he was from the same area of New Jersey as where I was born. My interest was piqued.

But it wasn’t until I was a teenager and heard “The River” that I fell in love with Springsteen’s lyrics. He told a story that came alive—his storytelling really brought these characters to life.

Later in life, I had a baby boy with colic on my hands, and I’d carry him around and sing “Johnny 99,” a song about a guy who loses his job and shoots a clerk—not your typical lullaby!

That colicky baby grew up and had to make the same transition to adulthood that I was making when I first got into Springsteen. Deciding which path to take can be so difficult. I wanted to write my son a letter to express what he meant to me. Springsteen helped me do the talking. In his song “Living Proof,” he talks about how a child is proof of God’s mercy and love. So I told my son, “That is how I feel about you. I hope one day you can see that about yourself.”

That’s what Springsteen does: He gives emotion a form. His music creates a world of wisdom.

SPORTS

Fan of

The Los Angeles Clippers

I got fired in 1992, and the guy told me that I would never amount to anything in life. I went home, lay on the couch and turned on the TV, and they were saying the same thing about the Clippers. I said, This is going to be my team. We are going to ride and die together.

In 2005, I thought of wearing a half-red, half-blue suit to the games because the NBA started making inactive players wear a sport coat on the bench. That suit has changed my life. I can’t believe celebrities know my name. I started a charity to show kids growing up in the hood, like I did, the kinds of things that are available in life. We take the kids to nice restaurants, and one of my celebrity friends will talk with them. Just to let them know what’s possible.

Fan of

The Atlanta Falcons

When my wife and I got married and moved to Atlanta 40 years ago, we got season tickets for the Falcons. Everything kind of grew from there.

For tailgating, we eventually came up with the Fanbulance. We wanted to have a vehicle that I could load all the gear into at the start of the season and be done. My first idea was to buy a hearse. But my wife said she was only going to take one ride in a hearse and it would not be to a football game. So, in 2003, we bought a used ambulance and decorated it with the team logo.

When we retired and moved near Orlando 10 years later, we had to retire that original Fanbulance. I didn’t trust it for the drive to Atlanta, so I bought a new Ford passenger van. We drive it to all the home games and meet up with friends there. I’m not one that gets upset all week if the Falcons lose, but I do jump and yell. I work out a lot of my aggressions. I’m not in condition to play anymore, so this is the next best thing.

Fan of

The Boston Red Sox

Lynne Smith, 78

Wellesley, Massachusetts

Retired teacher/guidance counselor

Every opening day at Fenway Park, I wear a hat that plays “Take Me Out to the Ball Game.” But the reason I’m called the Fenway Hat Lady is because of a different hat that I wear to every other Red Sox game I attend. It has a miniature Fenway Park on top of it, with tiny plastic ballplayers, and I always make sure the numbers on their jerseys correspond to the real Red Sox who are in the lineup that day. The hat also has a Citgo sign that lights up like the real one you can see from Fenway. I wear it just to make people smile.

At home, we’ve got all kinds of Red Sox decor, including a custom-painted bathroom. And when one of our trees got damaged in a storm, I hired a chain saw artist to turn it into a 7-foot garden gnome in a Red Sox cap. I talk to the gnome. Whether he listens, I don’t know.

My husband, Gary, and I have had season tickets near first base for decades. A few years ago, the Red Sox made me a special ambassador, and I can go anywhere in the park. It’s a magical place, and fans like to get their picture taken with the Hat Lady. I once calculated that I’ve been in about 10,000 photos. It’s interesting how my life is intertwined with so many people, and it’s all because of the team.

Fan of

The Minnesota Vikings

SHIRLEY BOWDEN, 63

Woodbury, Minnesota

Nurse case manager

Being a fan is such an emotional investment. I remember one time when I was teenager, my mom saw me watching a football game. I was sitting on the edge of the table, and she said, “Oh, look everyone. Shirley is so excited and into the game. How cute!” I remember rolling my eyes and thinking, Of course. It’s the Vikings.

But now all the family is on board. On game days, I put up a Vikings flag at the house in the morning. It goes down when we go to bed. My son and I meet up and then drive out to meet my brother and his family at the game. I always get looks because I yell like a crazy person, but I’m 100 percent convinced that we help the team win when we make a lot of noise. It’s not a good game if my voice isn’t gone by the end.

Football is addicting; once it gets in your blood, it’s hard to get it out. I love it and especially love my Minnesota Vikings. Every year, I think this is going to be the year. They come so close, it’s exciting—and crushing when they lose. It hasn’t happened yet, but maybe this year.

Fan of

Jim Clark, Scottish Racing Driver

CLYDE BERRYMAN, 68

Williamsburg, Virginia

Retired art gallery owner and business manager for his artist spouse, Gulay Berryman

When I was a child, my family was living in Tripoli, Libya. One day my first-grade teacher took our class for a picnic to Wheelus Air Base, and I discovered the remains of Mellaha, an old racetrack that had been used in the 1930s. The grandstand was still there. Later, in talking to longstanding Italian residents of Libya who remembered the races, I became fascinated. If I was a good boy on shopping trips, my mother would take me to an Italian-owned hobby shop, where I could add to my model-car collection. Today, I have well over a thousand model racing cars and sports cars, as well as dioramas I’ve built of historic Formula One races.

A common question in racing is: Who was the greatest driver of all time? Also, how do you determine how much credit should go to the driver who wins and how much to the car? In the 1990s, I began creating a math rating system to answer these questions. In 2021, I published QPRS: F1 Grand Prix Racing by the Numbers (1950–2019), a book based on my calculations. On the cover is the man whom I ranked as the greatest-ever F1 Grand Prix driver: Jim Clark.

Clark came from a sheepherding family in Scotland, but he had an extraordinary natural talent for racing. Driving for the British car manufacturer Lotus, he won the F1 World Drivers’ Championship in 1963 and again in 1965. In my model collection, I have just about every F1 car Clark ever drove.

Clark’s last win was in South Africa in 1968. Later that year, at a relatively minor Formula Two race at Hockenheim in Germany, he was killed when his car inexplicably shot off the track into some trees. Nobody has ever solved the mystery of exactly what happened, but no one I have ever talked to believes it was driver error; it must have been something mechanical, to do with the car. Clark was only 32. According to my math system, no F1 driver to this day has ever eclipsed his greatness.

Fan of

University of Virginia Athletics

CHARLIE LORBER, 78

Naples, Florida

Retired attorney

When I was young, baseball was my passion. I went to my first Major League Baseball game in 1951. My father surprised me by picking me up from my second-grade class and taking me to the ballpark. It was the first game of the World Series. I saw Willie Mays, Monte Irvin, Joe DiMaggio, Mickey Mantle, Yogi Berra and Phil Rizzuto, all on the same field—all of them now in the Hall of Fame. Back then, my father owned a pharmacy and worked six days a week, sometimes seven. Baseball was a terrific bonding experience, in the little time we had together.

I went to the University of Virginia in 1962. At that time, we were bad in everything, but I went to all the games. I joined a fraternity, and my friends and I never missed a football game, never missed a basketball game, never missed a lacrosse game. My freshman year, I signed on as the student manager of the basketball team and went to every game for all four years. To me, UVa was a magical place. In those days, there were about 6,000 students. You knew everybody. I had four younger brothers, and three of them went to Virginia.

I have a group of fraternity buddies that have been together now for over 60 years. We are spread across the country, and one of us lives in Jerusalem. But every year, as many of us as possible get together to go to a football game. We go to the first round of the NCAA basketball tournament. For years, I had season football tickets and my wife and I would drive down from New Jersey, where my law practice was. How many games have I been to, in Charlottesville and elsewhere? Hundreds.

Right now it’s a tragic time to be a Virginia alumnus and sports fan. The march on Charlottesville in 2017 and the recent killing of football players—these things are horrible. You just feel so much for the students, the victims, the families. Because the University of Virginia, for me at least, is more than a school. It’s a community. A state of mind.

TV/MOVIES

Fan of

The Sopranos

Growing up in Pakistan, I learned about America through TV and films. Mafia stories like The Godfather hooked me. I was fascinated by characters who could be both evil and sympathetic.

When I moved to America, at 24, discovering The Sopranos continued my education in American culture. But it also reminded me of home. Pakistan is afflicted with corruption: nepotism, backdoor deals, strategic favors. Seeing this same type of corruption play out in U.S. society felt strangely comforting. No matter where you are, greed and the battle for power appear.

I also love the show because it’s at odds with who I am. I’m an intensely polite person. Tony Soprano is the opposite. He is tough and brazen, and he tells it like it is. When a patient who is abusing drugs demands a painkiller prescription from me, I tap into my inner Tony to stand my ground.

Fan of

Friends

When my daughter, Treya, was stillborn in 2006, I fell into a deep depression. My husband had to return to his deployment in Iraq. I was broken, but I still had three sons to look after.

My oldest son, who was 19, had been lent a few DVDs of the show Friends, and he urged me to have a look. “It will make you feel better,” he promised. That show made me laugh for the first time in what felt like forever. I suddenly had six companions who could distract me and never need anything in return. The grief of losing my daughter has never gone away, but I’ve learned to live with it.

My sons are adults now and are total addicts of the show too. I have a tattoo of the logo’s colorful dots, and my son has a Friends-inspired tattoo too. To me, those six characters really are my friends. They helped me through the darkest period of my life.

Fan of

Whoopi Goldberg

KATHY PINERA, 63

Emerson, New Jersey

Horse show official

When I saw Whoopi Goldberg’s HBO special in the ’80s, I thought it was just so refreshing, so original. Then The Color Purple comes out, and I was, like, Oh, my God, this woman is amazing. She can do everything. Then came Ghost, and she was so good in that. I loved Comic Relief, her specials with Robin Williams and Billy Crystal to raise money for the homeless. And I watch her regularly on The View. I don’t agree with everything she says, but she’s good at her job, and I appreciate that.

When a friend’s black Lab had puppies in the late ’80s, I got the pick of the litter, and I said, “I’m going to name her Whoopi.” That dog was still alive when I adopted a yellow Lab–pit bull mix and named her Oda Mae—the name of Whoopi’s character in Ghost. Since then, every dog I’ve had has been named after a character played by Whoopi: Cutty (from The Associate), Corrina (from Corrina, Corrina), Myrlie (from Ghosts of Mississippi) and Clarence (after Sister Mary Clarence in Sister Act).

Whoopi breaks the norm. She doesn’t cave to pressure from society. She’s true to herself. I like people like that.

Fan of

Harry Potter

MARJAN FARZAAD, 62

Coos Bay, Oregon

Retired biologist

Although I’m a lifelong fantasy buff, I had ignored the Harry Potter series when the first few books came out in the late 1990s. I thought they were for kids. I only picked up the first book in 2001 because I was teaching a course in behavior styles and the four houses at Hogwarts were similar to the four styles of behavior. I was curious about the book. I thoroughly enjoyed it, but the second book is what blew my mind. A story arc that runs through the whole series? This isn’t just Nancy Drew with wizards? Wow! OK, take my money. Two decades later, I’m a devoted Potter cosplayer, with replicas of every prop, right down to the brooches and pins.

I was an Iranian child whose parents trained her to be Western in the prerevolution era. I spent a lot of time in European summer schools becoming fluent in multiple languages so I could get into an Ivy League school. That was my parents’ dream, which I realized for them. So, seeing castles with the backdrop of British hillsides or the Swiss Alps is nostalgic for me—it reminds me of a simpler time in my life.

When I watched the first Harry Potter movie, the first glimpse of Hogwarts across the lake was like a homecoming. It washed 30 years right off my body. I wept. I had tried to forget that enchanted past so I could deal with a practical life of paying the bills. But that kid who felt free for the first time in her life, that kid who caught a glimpse of how big the world was—that kid had been forgotten and buried under life’s debris. Harry Potter gave me that back.

Fan of

Star Wars

LAURA SMITH LARA, 66

Lakehills, Texas

Retired elementary school librarian

I was always a nerdy kid. In college, I was the only girl in my D&D group. When my then-boyfriend and I first saw Star Wars, our minds were blown. The special effects, the story line—it was something we had never seen before. As the credits rolled, we left the theater and got back in line for the next show.

I loved the whole series, but it wasn’t until much later, after I was married with kids and grandkids, that I got into dressing up in Star Wars costumes to have fun. For me, it became a way to connect with my grandson, who was 8 years old at the time. He wanted to attend a meeting of the Star Wars Society of San Antonio, and he was very persuasive, so I took him. They were discussing participating in an upcoming nighttime parade.

I had created historical costumes for my husband, children and myself to participate in reenactments, so I made Star Wars costumes for myself, my grandson and my husband, and we participated in the parade in San Antonio and had a blast. From there, my son and daughter got involved, and we started going to conventions as a family. It’s something fun we can share.

At one convention, I decided to portray Darth Talon, a Twi’lek Sith Lord from the Star Wars books series. Picture me lying on the floor in a red bodysuit for hours, as my grown children painted all the required black tattoos. At the convention, I was encouraged to enter the costume contest and was awarded First Place Overall, Female.

People don’t expect to see a grandma battling with light sabers or impersonating an alien, but I could beat any of my students in a Star Wars trivia contest. Older women can be both grandmothers and nerds. In an odd way, fantasy has helped me to see what’s real: spending time with your loved ones, and doing what you love, regardless of society’s expectations.

Fan of

Star Wars

ROGER LEE, 58

Auburn, Washington

Middle school history teacher

When I saw my first Star Wars movie, it was monumental. I’d never seen a line of people snake around the movie theater like that! Everyone at school was talking about the film. You had to see it. And over 40 years later, there are kids who feel the same way about these movies. It’s amazing to me that a fandom this old is still so vital.

When I teach the history of ancient civilizations to the sixth grade, we talk about the Roman Senate and the Roman Republic, and how the republic was subverted over time by the new emperors. Someone in the class will usually ask, “So, they kind of copied Roman history for Star Wars?” Yes. It’s kind of a light bulb moment for them. And once they realize that there’s a popular show that is borrowing from history, it helps me get more kids interested in history.

But Star Wars is not only helpful to me at work. I use it to relax. I’ll get on my stationary bike and watch one of the films, and it takes my mind off whatever happened during the day. Sometimes our faith in humanity is challenged by stuff going on in the real world, in the news. So, it’s nice to be able to watch or read these stories that, at their core, are about good versus evil—and good usually ends up winning.

Fan of

Seinfeld

KIM MAZUR, 64

Palm Harbor, Florida

HR professional

Seinfeld is my family’s way of communicating. My kids, all in their 30s, span states and continents. But when we quote the show, it immediately connects us to family memories, no matter the distance between us.

We began watching Seinfeld two decades ago, when they were in their early teens. The snark and sarcasm shaped our family’s sense of humor. In a way, it’s like a specialized lexicon, and there’s a line for any situation. What message do you leave for someone who doesn’t answer that damn phone? “Hi, Jerry. Mr. Steinbrenner’s here. George is dead. Call me back.” What do you say when a family member gets upset? “Serenity now!”

As families grow up, kids have their own interests, friends and eventually families. But it takes only one funny line to immediately reconnect you and put you back in the groove, no explanation needed.

MISC.

The British Royal Family

I’ve been a “royals watcher” since the marriage of Diana and Charles in 1981. It was the fairy-tale romance of the time, and I was simply swept up in it. Of course, it ended sadly. I watched Diana’s funeral and was devastated. But I have seen her sons grow, marry and have families of their own.

On a torrentially rainy day this past November, I waited for more than three hours to catch a glimpse of Prince William and Princess Kate at City Hall Plaza in Boston. Despite the weather and having to stand for hours, it was a thrill—my first time seeing the royals in person in all these years.

They’re just magnetic. They have that royal posture and bearing. Even on a cold and rainy day, they were ramrod straight, not one hair out of place, clothes unwrinkled. William spoke about environmental advocacy, an issue I care about deeply.

There are so many celebrities nowadays because of social media. Anyone can be a hero. For me, I want to believe in something. I want to believe in people. I believe in the royal family. I know they’re controversial. They’re flawed, like any human beings can be. But they have persisted through time. I’ve lived through their heartaches, their missteps and their flaws. Yet still they carry on.

Fan of

Barbie

STANLEY COLORITE, 51

Tampa Bay area, Florida

Retired food-service worker

In my 20s, I experienced two traumatic events: a near-fatal collision with a car on my bike, and my mother’s death in a house fire. I went into a deep depression and thought, No one will love me because I’m scarred. My mother had 35 Barbies that I inherited upon her death, and I decided to continue collecting the dolls because it kept me connected to her memory. I figured, if I’m going to be alone, I should find something that brings me joy. And Barbie brings me joy. So, I decided to buy any Barbie I wanted.

The first one I bought to add to the collection was the 1992 Holiday Barbie—it was from the same year that I lost my mother. It felt like my mother was trying to connect with me and tell me everything would be OK. The more I learned about the history of Barbie and saw the beautiful assortment of accessories and play sets, the creativity and imagination and love poured into designing her world—it was just beautiful! And I believe Barbie needs to be taken out of the box and enjoyed.

When I enter my home and leave the outside world, I enter a place of joy, safety, seclusion and positivity. Barbie is about positivity, and I am about positivity. And that’s a value passed on to me by my mother and accentuated by Barbie.