How to Make Your Online Dating Profile Stand Out

Rebecca Nelson, 67, began online dating several years ago after moving to Nashville, Tennessee. The retiree spent upwards of a week creating the perfect profile for several dating sites and apps, repeating key words and phrases like “active” and “adventuresome” and “seeks an emotionally intelligent and well-grounded partner” to increase her match chances.​

Nelson was generally pleased with the results, getting “more in-depth responses and messages than I might have expected,” she says. “I think it’s because I took such care with the profile.”​

Dating profiles should reflect your personality​

The bio section should include enough information to reveal who you are, but keep it on the shorter side, so it’s not overwhelming. Think quality over quantity. “You want to create some level of intrigue and curiosity,” Diamond says.​

Nelson adapted OkCupid’s profile template for several other dating sites and apps, such as Bumble, Match and Zoosk, and regularly altered the profiles to shorten them or make them easier to read.

In answer to the prompt “On a Friday night, you’ll find me doing ...,” for example, she reduced her answers from six to three.​

Your profile isn’t a résumé, so you don’t need to list all of your degrees and jobs. Instead, include your preferences, like you’d rather walk on the beach than hike in the mountains. Keep the tone conversational and friendly.​

“You’re not going into business with your date — you’re looking for someone to enjoy life with,” Watson says.

Not only can writing about your hobbies help you connect with others who enjoy similar activities, SilverSingles’ studies show that profiles mentioning hobbies like cooking, dancing and gardening get more messages.​

Limit the selfies and include current images​

Include photos in your profile, because they’re what people see first. Photos also are more likely to draw responses and start conversations by prompting someone to ask where an image was shot. In fact, eHarmony says people with four or more photos receive the most inquiries from matches.​

You don’t need professional photographs, but images should be attractive and poses should be natural and relaxed, online dating experts say. Don’t forget to smile.​

Make your lead profile image a solo shot. Other photos can include a mix of headshots, full-body images, and group and activity shots. If you say you like to cycle, include a photo of you biking. Avoid old photos that no longer resemble you and images of you wearing sunglasses or anything that obscures your face.

Do not use selfies — especially if they’re taken in a car, in a bathroom mirror or in bed. Selfies are typically poor quality unless they’re done with a selfie stick.

And if you have a pet you love, include it in a photo. SilverSingles’ studies show that including a cat or dog in profile photos catches the attention of other members.​

Embrace new dating profile features​

Virtual dating, video messages and audio greetings emerged during the pandemic, when people weren’t meeting in person, but they’re sticking around as options for easing into dating. For example, eHarmony offers video dating, Grindr provides video chat and OurTime has audio greetings. ​

These are opportunities to talk about yourself in ways not available in other parts of your profile, such as what your interests are and what you seek in a partner. Suggest what you’d like to do on a first date. Be creative. Active dates and experiences, such as picnics, bowling or hiking, are hot.​

Editor's note: This article was originally published on January 26, 2022. It has been updated to reflect new information.