Cher, 78, Tells All About Her Wild Life and Loves

You don’t feel bitter or traumatized?

I’m sure I’m traumatized, but I have something else inside. Even though we had problems, my mom was a huge influence on me. I didn’t realize until I was putting it all down how much I’m like her and how little I’m like her. My mom had a huge temper and would blow up right away. All those things that happened have stuck to me in one way, but then I was like Teflon in another way. My mother was so crazy and got so angry, but she was the most fun person in the universe. You can needle me for a long time and I won’t react, but if you go far enough, it’s not pretty.

Do you still battle stage fright and a lack of confidence?

It exists in me for sure. If I can just get on stage, I’m going to be fine. I know lots of women stars who are like that. I’m very shy in my personal life, but once I get on stage, I love it.

The extent of Sonny’s controlling behavior, infidelity and abuse is shocking. You seemed to tolerate a lot.

He did some things that were like, “Are you crazy?” And things that were, “How could you do this?” Like when he took all my money. One time I asked him, “What was the moment that you decided it was OK to take my money, when you thought, “Oh, this is a good idea?” And he said, “I always knew you’d leave.” If he walked in right now, we would be Sonny & Cher again. Even though he did all these ridiculous things, there was a bond. Sometimes I hated him. I was so angry and couldn’t understand why he would do such awful things, but I was angry at him like a child.

"Ready for an awards show."

Courtesy of Cher

You were blindsided by huge IRS taxes that wiped you out, and an egregious contract Sonny made you sign. After that, did you pay closer attention to money and deadlines?

I wish I could say yes, but I’m still not good at it. There are things that are so stupid. If I have to do something, sometimes I wait till the last minute. The book publishers were losing their minds telling me "it’s five weeks past the deadline, it’s three months past the deadline." I wrote the book, but I couldn’t read the book. I just couldn’t face it.

The Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour was a huge hit, but didn't Sonny jam the schedule with outside work?

Sonny took on too much. We would go from the show to gigs. Usually once a year I would go to the hospital. Gigging wasn’t hard, it just was too much.  [Producer/director] George Schlatter said, “If Sonny and Cher were driving from the Valley into town, Sonny would book a gig on Mulholland.”

You grew up surrounded by celebrities. Did they spark your ambitions?

It had no effect on me, because they were my people, just the people I knew. I always wanted to sing and act and make people happy. I didn’t know exactly what acting meant except that I saw my mom do it on stage. I never thought I would do it in real life, but I thought I would do it as a cartoon. I wanted to be Dumbo. I wanted to be Cinderella.

Your romance with David Geffen came at a critical time, right?

You have no idea what my life would have been without Dave. I wouldn’t have been able to do anything. Dave wanted to see my contract. I said, “I’ve never seen it.” I was very born yesterday. He found it and said, “This is involuntary servitude. Do you realize you don’t have any power and don’t own anything?” Not only did Sonny take my money, he made it impossible for me to make more. Thank God for Dave for a million reasons. He was there for me, and we had so much fun together. He was a workaholic when we met, but then he stopped going to the office every day. He always took care of me. At that point, I didn’t have money. He’s my hero. I love Dave.

You and Gregg Allman had a strong connection, but his heroin addiction got in the way. How did you avoid that trap?

Had I liked drugs, I would have done them. I did some drugs a couple of times, and they had the worst effect on me. And I thought, I’m not doing this. I don’t care how cool it is. I had friends that did drugs and it never made them better. Gregory was the most adorable man who happened to do drugs, and it ruined his life.

"In the Rudi Gernreich outfit the saleswoman told me I couldn’t afford. I bought it in three colors."

Courtesy of Cher

You were a tomboy who liked football and once needed rubber bands to hold your shoes together. Yet you became one the world’s most influential fashion icons. What drove you there?

When I was young, my mom and her friends were the most fashionable and beautiful women I’d ever seen. Some had more money than others. My mother would save up forever to buy a belt. Or she would go to second-hand stores and find genius things. I only knew stylish women, and there was so much I learned from them. All these beautiful women were looking for rich men, and when they got them, they didn’t like them, and they’d end up with a poor man.

Producer and convicted murderer Phil Spector was crucial when you started your career at 17, but after he illegally released a single you sang on, didn't he display a gun?

He played with the gun and picked up the handle. I told him, “It’s me, Cher. I know you, OK, Phillip? Don’t play this game with me.” I only saw [his rage] one time, when Harry Nilsson and I were going to do the background vocals for John Lennon and a chair came flying out of the studio, and John walked out furious. When I was young, Phillip was a little bit strange but also funny. His mom and dad were first cousins. Am I surprised that it got dark? I’m only surprised that it got that dark.

You were raised in chaos. Were your kids?

My kids had a chaotic life too, and I, unfortunately, couldn’t be there all the time. Chaz was with me a lot when I was working. I did the best I could. Do I wish I’d done better? Absolutely.

Are you living your best life?

Sometimes. I’m privileged for sure. I know what it’s like to live poor. Not at the bottom. Other people have lives 1,000 times worse than mine was. A lot of times we had all kinds of great things. But sometimes when you eat your beans and they turn sour, you know something’s wrong.