Donnie Wahlberg: Hanging Tough and Feeling Fortunate

What are you going to miss about it?

I really loved going to work every day. I tried to bring that love and appreciation for being there to the set every day.… I loved working with the crew and the cast. I got to know so many of the crew members and about their lives. I’ve sort of grown old with a lot of them and watched their kids grow up. Those relationships that were built over all those years will be the thing I miss most.

What would people be surprised to know about Tom Selleck?

The level of commitment he has to the show. He comes in and films for three days, and … stays in the city and edits and works on scripts and is constantly working to make the show better. It’s inspiring. It’s one of the ways that he and I get along. We both are tireless workers, and we really want the best. It’s one of the great pillars of our relationship. [Two is] people are very intimidated by Tom. He’s really tall [6 foot 4] and has a big presence, and he walks in a room and you know he’s there. He’s formidable — physically, intellectually [but] there’s a vulnerability to him. A lot of his drive and his work ethic comes from not being overconfident. It may even be the opposite. A lot of people who work hard for as many years as he has have a sense of entitlement after all these years.… We don’t control our destiny in this industry — it’s at the mercy of so many — and Tom’s never lost sight of that.

New Kids on the Block has exploded again in popularity. You just wrapped up a summer tour and have a Las Vegas residency scheduled for next year. How’s the second time around been?

The best way to describe it is it’s like having a second chance to go back and do everything again with what I know now. The fans scream as loudly as they did in 1990. They show up ready for concerts and cruises and whatever it is we do in numbers that are the same as 1990. It’s just as successful — and in many ways more successful — as it was back then. And the beauty of it is, now I’m in a place where I’m able to appreciate it more. When you’re that famous at 20 years old, it’s harder to fully understand how fortunate you are. Your priorities sometimes aren’t necessarily what they would be when you’re 50 or 55 years old as I am now. Right now, I show up to work and am grateful every day for these opportunities. Despite the hard work and effort, this could have all turned out very different.

As a teen, Donnie Wahlberg, second from left, became New Kids on the Block's first member. Joe McIntyre, Jon Knight, Danny Wood and Jordan Knight soon joined. The group is starting a Las Vegas residency in 2025.

Robin Platzer/Getty Images

What’s the secret to managing both a network TV series and a concert tour?

I’ve heard athletes describe being a veteran as the game slows down, everything slows down a little bit, and you’re able to take it in more and see things developing in front of you, see plays developing. For me, it slows down, despite the fact that I’m bouncing from city to city constantly. Like this summer, I was filming Blue Bloods and touring at the same time. I was literally flying back and forth to set, to stage, set to stage, set to stage, and then sneaking in Celtics games in between somehow. But even though I’m moving really fast, it also has slowed down tremendously. I’m able to cherish the moments more, to be present more.

I read that you and Jenny renew your wedding vows every year. Why?

At the time of our first anniversary [Wahlberg and McCarthy wed on Aug. 31, 2014], I thought it would be something fun to do for us, so I surprised her and just told her we were going to dinner. And I made a detour by the hotel where we got married —  this historic hotel in St. Charles, Illinois, where we live — and [we] do a renewal on the patio overlooking the river that runs through the town. It was so fun and so sweet, and she was so surprised that I surprised her again the next year. And then I did it the next year, and it became a ritual where I would try to surprise her. I’ve done it on a Zoom meeting [during COVID]; on an island; in Madison Square Garden one year. It’s always the same reverend, by the way. It really is like we got married again and we’re still on the honeymoon from the vow renewal ceremony.... I think Jenny said it herself: “People renew their driver’s license. Why not renew this?” It’s been really wonderful for our relationship. I do recommend it if you want to reconnect and re-cement that foundation.

You said being twentysomething and famous was hard to manage. How do you look back on it?

On the one hand, we became so successful, who would ever feel deserving of that at 20 years old? I didn’t. I don’t think any of my bandmates did. Then, on the other side, we were criticized constantly. We were told we didn’t have any talent. We were written off as this manufactured boy band and we didn’t bring anything to the table. So there’s that. So we’re fighting against that to prove ourselves. There’s this conundrum where you’re literally at odds with yourself and with your success. And you want to fight for it every single day, but then at other times you don’t feel deserving of it.

Your kids [Xavier, 31, and Elijah, 23, with ex-wife Kimberly Fey] are now grown up. Did you encourage or discourage them to go into show business?

It’s really about me encouraging them to see it as their journey and not be burdened or bothered by the fact that, ‘Well, if I do music, people are gonna say I’m just your son. I’m living off of you, or it’s nepotism.’ I want them to find their path and commit to it and believe in it and follow to their heart’s content.

What would you tell your younger self?

Everything’s going to be OK. In the moments when young Donnie was unsettled or uncertain or not knowing and everyone was telling us “Your band’s going to last two years and it’s over, so prepare for it,” I would say: “Just stay the course and keep trusting that the universe will provide if you keep working and you keep on your path. There’s only opportunities. Challenges are opportunities to learn and to grow and to build your next opportunity.”