25 Great Ways to Step Outside Your Comfort Zone

Challenge yourself to public speaking, traveling solo or seeking a new hobby

Tracy Schorn,

AARP

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Published November 06, 2024

a person sticking their head outside of a box

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Research shows that for older adults, a daily routine can help reduce stress and anxiety. However, the predictability of daily life can also lull us into a sense of complacency. Trying a new skill, meeting new people or traveling somewhere unfamiliar may seem overwhelming, but stepping outside of our comfort zones can provide a host of mental health benefits, and research suggests that novelty and new experiences may also promote brain health. To help give you the courage to try something new, we’ve gathered ways to mentally prepare yourself — as well as a sampling of new adventures to try — so you can shake up your routine and live a fuller life.

1. Break it down

To avoid anxiety responses to new challenges, break them into pieces. Imagine you’re trying to learn Italian. Instead of immersing yourself in a full Verdi opera, start by memorizing 10 vocabulary words, or a couple of greetings, says neuropsychologist John B. Arden, author of Rewire Your Brain 2.0.: Five Healthy Factors to a Better Life. “We have two hemispheres in our brain,” Arden says. “The right side sees the big picture. The left hemisphere is more for details, routines and approaching a new behavior. When the right side of the brain is overactive, you’ll feel anxious and overwhelmed by the totality of everything.” Small and repetitive successes will forge new neural pathways so you can stick with changes in the long term.

2. Face your fears

Afraid of heights? Claustrophobic? Confront your fears by gradually putting yourself into the “discomfort zones” that trigger your anxiety. Psychologists call this exposure therapy. While it has a success rate up to 90 percent when done under a doctor’s care, you probably don’t need professional help unless your phobias are profoundly debilitating. For most of us, facing our mundane fears head on and pushing past them can help us feel courageous. It might also be the first step toward deeper changes.

3. Train yourself to be positive

You can teach yourself to tamp down anxiety and be more courageous about new experiences by creating positive feedback loops, Arden says. Neuroplasticity describes the brain’s ability to adapt to changing environments and learn from them by forging new neural pathways. “The whole idea of ‘behavior changes the way you think and feel’ now is supported by neuroscience,” Arden says. “You have to force yourself to tread new neural pathways. How do you create new pathways? By doing what you don’t feel like doing until you feel like doing it.” Arden gives the example of studying for a test. “It doesn’t feel right. Because you’ve got to practice.” After a while, studying becomes a habit. “But just having a new habit doesn’t mean that it’s going to be there forever. You’ve got to stay determined.” Eventually, discomfort gives way to the reward of a new positive behavior.

4. Learn assertiveness

Sometimes stepping outside of your comfort zone means improving your personal relationships or letting go of ones that no longer work. “If you feel uncomfortable when you’re around someone, it’s worth taking a deeper look,” says Lauren R. Taylor, an empowerment self-defense instructor in Washington, D.C., who teaches assertiveness training. If someone is harassing you, stand in a strong, assertive pose. It’s a universal stance that says: “You’re crossing a line.” It’s important to be congruent when you’re being assertive, Taylor says. Don’t smile if you want someone to back off. “Practice using your voice, body and face to give a consistent message,” she says.

a person throwing a paper airplane with their phone on it

It's always going to be easier to stare at your phone than be present among friends, but time away from screens has major benefits.

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5. Drop the devices

Technology use might be the most common comfort zone of modern life. We spend so much time staring at computers for work or scrolling through our phones when we’re home that we often feel lost if we don’t have a screen in front of us. While all those hours online may help reduce your risk of dementia, time away from screens has major benefits, too, including better sleep, less eye strain, more physical activity and better social interactions.

6. Don’t go it alone

It may be easier to try a class or exercise regimen with a partner. If a friend isn’t available, look online for fellow enthusiasts. Most niche hobbies have a virtual community. “Supportive, reciprocal social interactions help us buffer stress,” Arden says.

7. Try a side hustle

If you’re up for a driving adventure and want to earn some extra cash to boot, consider driving for a ride-booking company or working for a meal delivery service. Rochester, New York, resident Robin Flanigan, an empty nester in her mid-50s, got the idea to be a delivery driver after visiting a friend whose 20-year-old son was working for DoorDash. She decided to give it a try and is hooked. “Dashing is exciting. I feel like I’m in a video game — somebody else has the controls and, for the most part, is responsible for where I go. I never know what’s coming next, and there’s a thrill in that,” Flanigan says.

8. Allow yourself to be vulnerable

One surefire way to stretch yourself is by being vulnerable. This means sharing deeply personal stories or opening up about your thoughts, fears, hopes and ambitions to someone you trust — a close friend or relative, or perhaps a therapist. But embracing your vulnerability isn’t just a way out of your comfort zone. Revealing our authentic, unguarded selves also helps us grow emotionally, build deeper connections and develop greater self-confidence. As popular psychology researcher, author and speaker Brené Brown said in a March 2012 TED Talk: “Vulnerability is not weakness. I define vulnerability as emotional risk, exposure, uncertainty. It fuels our daily lives. And I’ve come to the belief … that vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage — to be vulnerable, to let ourselves be seen, to be honest.”

9. Choose activities about which you know absolutely nothing

If you want to exit your comfort zone in a major way, immerse yourself in something you’ve never done before — mah-jongg, soap carving or geocaching. Your brain will thank you. While curiosity and novelty seeking shake up old routines, they also play important roles in maintaining cognitive function, learning and even longevity for older adults. They can help stave off dementia as well. In one study, published in 2019 in Frontiers in Aging Neuroscience, researchers gave 70 older adults intellectually demanding activities over seven weeks and found that the challenges had lasting effects on their cognition.

a person riding on an airplane with their luggage

Take a solo trip — you might discover you enjoy the pleasures of autonomy and being on your own schedule.

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10. Book a solo trip

Solo travel intimidates many people, Stark says. Her advice: If it’s something you want to do, feel the anxiety and do it anyway. You might discover you enjoy the pleasures of autonomy and being on your own schedule. You won’t be alone, either: According to the American Express 2024 Global Travel Trends Report, 66 percent of all respondents plan to travel solo this year, and 60 percent plan to take more than one trip. The most cited reason: self-care.

11. Switch up your daily routines

You don’t need huge, dramatic life changes to get out of your comfort zone. It can be as simple as mixing up your daily routine. For example, if you usually drive to work, try taking public transportation if it’s available where you live (or vice versa). Or if you’ve eaten the same breakfast cereal every day for years, maybe it’s time to have scrambled eggs. Researchers at the University of Miami and New York University found that even small changes to a person’s daily routine can elevate brain activity and make them feel happier.

12. Become a leader

If taking on a leadership role feels daunting to you, why not give it a shot? Start small by volunteering to lead a project or task at work, in your neighborhood or in a local service organization. From there, you can build up to bigger challenges. In addition to the personal satisfaction of leading a project to completion, you might gain valuable skills in interpersonal communications, conflict resolution, decision-making and much more.

13. Have that difficult conversation

If you’re trying to find the courage for a hard conversation, like breaking up with a romantic partner or setting a personal boundary, prepare an internal script first, Taylor suggests. Next, put those demands into sentences. Be specific. “Don’t say ‘I want you to respect me,’ ” she says. “It’s unclear. Instead, tell them how you want them to respect you, like ‘Let me finish without interrupting,’ or ‘I need you to show up when you say you will.’ ” Then practice before you confront.

14. Tell your story … to a live audience

Want to overcome a fear of public speaking? Consider joining Toastmasters, a local poetry slam or a storytelling community. Storyteller Paul Doncaster, who has won many Boston-area Moth story-slams, says the medium appeals to him because it’s an easier type of performing outlet “that doesn’t require more traditional talents” like dancing or singing. Doncaster came to storytelling after a personal loss and was “looking for a way to get back into the world.” His first event was at his local library. “There were only about 15 people, but everyone was very supportive and encouraging,” he says.

Put yourself out there by recording a podcast. You might find a community you didn't know existed.

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15. Take to the mic

Feel like you have something interesting to say but don’t know how to reach a bigger audience? Become a podcaster. All it takes to start is a laptop and a phone, says Lauren Passell, the founder of Tink Media, a podcast marketing firm in New York City. “You can record onto a voice memo app on your phone,” she says. Most computers come with audio-editing software like GarageBand. (Audacity and Adobe Audition are examples of similar software.) Start-up costs are modest, but if you want your podcast to reach a broad audience, you’ll need to subscribe to a hosting platform like Libsyn, Blubrry or Riverside, which can cost $20 a month or more. The diversity within podcasting is staggering. One of Passell’s clients records bedtime stories; another has a multigenerational show with family members. “I met a woman who has a podcast called Am I Old Yet? She is almost 80 and had a life in the theater and does radio plays,” she says.

16. Turn loss into action

Vikki Stark, author of Runaway Husbands and The Divorce Talk, was jolted out of her comfort zone in traumatic fashion — her husband left her after 21 years of marriage. Her reaction? She started a community for divorced women. Stark views loss as an opportunity. “Consider how you want to spend the rest of your life,” she says. “Who were you before you were part of a couple? It’s never too late to start over.” Throwing yourself into a new activity with a built-in community can take your mind off of loss, too. Stark joined a women’s barbershop chorus. “I have an awful voice! But harmonizing week after week with that wonderful group really helped me,” she says.

17. Everybody dance now

Never been a dancer before? Why not give it a try? With its emphasis on socializing and movement, dancing shakes up your routine and provides multiple benefits for brain health. According to the 2020 report “Music on Our Minds” by the AARP-founded Global Council on Brain Health, music and dancing can reduce stress, lift your mood, improve balance and even boost your immune system.

18. Open up your home

Meeting people from outside your cultural background can be a novel experience. Elevate it by bringing them into your home. Charitable organizations always need hosts for artists, visiting scholars and others. Or consider taking in a foreign student. Rotary Youth Exchange, Youth for Understanding USA and AFS Intercultural Programs can connect you with high school exchange students during the summer or school year. Plus, you can practice your conversational skills in a second language, which has cognitive benefits that extend beyond communication. According to a 2023 study reported in the journal Neurobiology of Aging, German researchers found that bilingualism could help stave off dementia symptoms. Beyond the cultural connections and boosts to brain health, relationships that span age groups offer other benefits. For example, AARP research shows that the most cited benefit of intergenerational friendships is the perspective of someone at a different life stage.

19. Lend a helping hand

Few things can push you out of your comfort zone faster than volunteering to help people in difficult situations. Whether it’s preparing food for the homeless, pitching in at a shelter for domestic-violence victims or mentoring in an adult-literacy program, volunteering can be one of life’s most rewarding experiences. Beyond the emotional satisfaction that comes from helping others, you might also learn new skills, meet new people and put yourself in unfamiliar settings.

a person thinking about decorating their empty walls

For big life changes, such as empty nesting or downsizing, change your surroundings to better reflect your new mindset.

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20. Update your space

Annapolis, Maryland-based interior designer Liz Johnson says many of her client’s interiors reflect their current stage of life, such as raising children or traveling for their careers. But life changes in older adulthood, such as empty nesting or downsizing, can let you chuck the old familiar for something that better reflects your individuality. To ease into it, Johnson suggests updating a bathroom. “You can do something really fabulous in a small space,” she says. Johnson likes to use bolder colors and metallics, or even a large pattern wallpaper. “It is so unexpected,” she says. “When you open the door, woo! You just opened up a jewel box.”

21. Get colorful

Step away from the beige. You can also add pops of color to your decor to bring out your personality and lift your mood, Johnson says. New paint is relatively inexpensive and can alter the mood of a room, says Johnson, who is a fan of painting ceilings the same shade as the walls. Besides unifying a space, she says it “feels like a hug.” She also suggests using your favorite art to anchor a room. Play off its colors and break up neutral furniture with accent pieces. “Get a funky-shaped chair in a bright color or take a period piece and paint it,” she says. Furniture is an investment, but throw pillows are inexpensive. “You don’t have to be safe with those,” Johnson says. “You can change them seasonally.”

22. Be an original

Why stop at throw pillows? Take a chance and adorn yourself with color, too. “Live in technicolor,” said fashion icon and interior designer Iris Apfel. She became a celebrity in her 80s and died in March 2024 at 102 as the doyenne of flamboyant style. In her 2024 “legacy book,” Colorful: A Treasure Trove of Inspiration, Influences, and Ideas, Apfel shared her philosophy about taking risks and standing out from the crowd. “To me, style implies originality, but also courage,” she wrote. “Doing new things takes a lot of strength. A lot of energy. It can be very tiring trying to make things happen, to push fears aside. It’s much easier to go with the flow — that’s what most people do. But it’s not very interesting.”

23. Downsize and declutter

When it comes to downsizing and decluttering, it’s common to resist change, says Boston-based interior designer Laurel Bern. Invariably, those who yearn to hang on to their possessions partner up with those more motivated to purge. Bern recommends bringing in a neutral third party. “This is when it is helpful to hire a professional organizer,” she says. “I think it’s better if it’s an outsider, not a family member. Emotions can run high.” Need help? AARP has an instructional video on YouTube as well as a comprehensive smart guide.

24. Learn to play a musical instrument

Mastering a musical instrument later in life isn’t just a huge leap out of your comfort zone. It also has brain health benefits, especially for memory. A study of adults ages 60 to 80 found that playing the piano improved their working memory, processing speed and verbal fluency. Another study, published in 2023, found that learning a musical instrument can improve retention and recall of written and spoken information in as little as 10 weeks.

25. Take satisfaction in trying

Finally, trying new things is not about perfection; it’s about the experience. “Your reach should exceed your grasp,” Stark says. “It’s from a poem ["Andrea del Sarto"] by Robert Browning. It means if you only try things that you know you can accomplish, you’ll never grow. If you stretch yourself and take the risk of trying something challenging, you may not make it, but at least you have the satisfaction of knowing you tried.” There’s also the possibility you will make it. So take the plunge.

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